April came and went. Last week was Easter and days before, Passover. My family barely acknowledged each holiday. My son refused to eat the matzo at preschool, but learned to sing a song about baby Moses in the river Nile. My husband and I put together small Easter/Ester/Spring baskets with plastic eggs and candy and my in-laws went overboard with candy and eggs. Since my Orthodox Jewish bubbie used to buy me Easter candy (hollow chocolate bunnies bigger than my forearm), I don’t see a conflict here. But with all of this month’s emphasis on religious celebrations, or at least secular versions of them, I attempted to address my own spiritual ambivalence. Originally, I believed I failed big time, but now that I look back on my goals for the month I see that I didn’t do so bad after all.
1. Meet with my friend, the Roller Derby Unitarian Minister. Meet and discuss; no obligations. CHECK! I really enjoyed meeting with Rev. Dawn. She’s a very warm and genuine person who intensely believes in her congregation. I even attended a service, with mixed feelings. It’s a wonderful, loving place, I’m just not sure it’s what I need right now. Maybe I’ll attend another service again in the future.
2. Read: God Said Ha! — CHECK; The God Delusion — No. I still intend to read Dawkins, I just need more time and concentration. I also put together a great reading list with the help of my neighbor, Dan. Thanks!
3. Bereavement support at Gilda’s Club — Well, I contacted someone at Gilda’s Club and got the calendar, but I didn’t attend any support groups. I’d still like to get involved with them at a future date when grad school deadlines don’t loom.
4. Face the eternal — I have friends willing to do the paperwork for a will for both me and my husband at an affordable price. Now, all we need to do is put together an outline of what we want and hand it over in June. Over dinner. Not so daunting when you add dinner.
So, I’m feeling better about this past month than I thought I would. Next month, however, I’m keeping the goals a bit more focused and achievable.
12resolutions 
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